Sebastian: Red dye number 6. Im still feeling sad and angry. A bunch of monologues from movies that you can try! Santana: And where are the Hardy Boys? No matter how rich, or famous or successful I become, when it comes to you, I'm always going to be that moon-eyed girl who freaked you out at a first glee rehearsal. Cant I just have one night where Im queen? Go. Quinn: You guys never understood the pressure I was under. The strive to create a safer, and more comfortable sex-toy shopping experience for the Queer community and more specifically gender non-conforming, trans and non-binary people. Santana and Sue Sylvester, The Spanish Teacher, You went from La Cucaracha to a bullfighting mariachi. Santana: Not just the school, you idiot. Finn: No she's not. I refused to go because Ive always been a big soccer gay. Homeless will be homeless for a while, that's sort of the problem. Maybe he finally got freaked out by your strange obsession with old people that causes you to skulk around nursing homes like one of those cats that can smell cancer. And Naya brought that same joy, that same energy, to the Glee Live tour and I got to be in the very same room with her while she sang that song, and its a memory Ill likely never forget. all, thats why it didnt work out with you and Blaine, right? You look a little Jewish, right Rachel? Santana: Okay, this is ridiculous. This is the first time were experiencing this. Sebastian: Trent, I got this. So please make sure your monologue is within . Thank you, Naya, for all of the knockout moments you gave us. Her wrath of words is called Snix Juice. Ive often described that while watching this scene I wept, which is true. Glee is very concerned with this idea of the underdog. And Rachel Berry and Kurt Hummel are the shows most prominent underdogs. I love you a-and I don't want to be with Sam or Finn or any of those other guys. And he meant it. Its one of the least flashy numbers, but one of the best. You cant blame me for anything Snix does, Santana to Principal Figgins, I Kissed a Girl, If you suspend me, I wont be able to beat Grimace and Mr. Schues butts, Santana to Principal Figgins about Finn and Will, I Kissed a Girl. Come on, Quinn. No me gusta! Santana: Are we dating or what? Santana: Come on, screw her. Like she was tired and so quietly righteous, which definitely wasnt how Santana usually cut people down. The Autostraddle TV Team is made up of Riese Bernard, Carmen Phillips, Kayla Kumari Upadhyaya, Valerie Anne, Natalie, Drew Burnett Gregory, Shelli Nicole, Nic, A. Tony Jerome, and Heather Hogan. Ooh la la, Rachel Berry in a towel. It sucked. Unmatched sass and the best . Quinn: Do you know what I hate? But there are some smaller moments that I think are really worth remembering. Santana: Yup, sure did. Also, she thinks youre a spritely, green, mythological creature, but I know youre a potato-eating poser. Now Santana and I are like Almond Joy and you're like a Jolly Rancher that fell in the ashtray. Maybe Blaine didnt wanna be with someo, obsession with old people that causes you to sk, you drape yourself on every piano you happen p, one with. Oh, come on. Or Tribeca. Just like that she can go from breaking your heart to making you laugh. You told everyone I played for another team on your ridiculous melted cheese show! When my mother asked what the sound was, I said I was practicing bird calls. Like a sad little panda. Then Mercedes looks at Santana from the corner of her eye, as if to say Girl can you do this? And Santana gives the smallest nod before the microphone picks up a sigh. Emmy Rossum is. Santanas terrified that the rumors floating around McKinley are about to ruin Santanas life, but maybe having Brittany will have made it all worth it. Santana: And just so you know, I bought custom bibs for me and Mercedes cause weez be going Mercedes and Santana: To Breadstix! Brittany Glee never shied away from making radical changes in characters or basic show universe elements without an explanation or any apparent logic, but they brought Santanas actual written history on the show and she wasnt originally written as gay to bear on her present. Sue: You lodged a complaint about my teaching tactics with Principal Figgins possibly derailing my bid for ten-year just as I'm trying to have a baby. For more information, please see our I remember crying as I watched someone I love walk down the aisle to marry the woman of her dreams. I may actually be dead right now. looks like they just removed their top row of dentures every time they smile, Santana: I really hope that's not one of the requirements for Regionals because with Berry and those tights, we don't stand a chance. Santana and Carl, The Rocky Horror Glee Show. It learned me two things. Im sorry. Santana: Yea, but he's not hot. I think about that scene all the time. That's like vocal masturbation. When listening to it and watching the scene I dont even realize that Naya has such a small part because her presence is the strongest there. Brittany: Wait are you mad? Rachel: For the hundredth time, okay, if you keep making fun of Brody- Where Im accepted?. Santana: The truth about what? To be honest, I dont know if I wouldve done it if it hadnt been for the smallest detail, sort of blurred in the background, almost off frame theres not a single recap that Ive ever read that includes it, but theres a Dominican flag on Abuelitas refrigerator. I am a thousand percent sure that Im actually going to be famous, just like Im a thousand percent sure that our man-child piano player keeps a petite Eurasian locked in a trunk underneath his bed. Oh ok. I mean, after all, that's why it didn't work out with you and Blaine, right? You like her more than me. She was so committed. Its just so fucking manic, this show. But I'm afraid of the talks and the looks. Lesbians dont have to be saintly to be fawned over on primetime television in homes across America. And I walk around so mad at the world, but Im really just fighting with myself. The kind of lesbians who would allow straight people to wrap themselves up in the cozy fantasy that gay people are just like them. And just when you thought it couldn't get any gayerit does. Feelings for you, that I'm afraid of dealing with, because I'm afraid of dealing with the consequences. NOTE: The following is a transcription of the extended director's cut from the S1 DVD, which includes several scenes not seen in the original aired version. Sweet. ". Its the single most thrilling three minutes the Glee ever produced. Santana: Your sexuality? I'm clearly the hottest bitch in this lousy joint. A sex-tape that follows me around to this very day.Look up at my in the internet right now. Maybe he finally got freaked out about your strange obsession with old people that causes you to skulk around nursing homes You suck at so many things. ryan murphy gets all the credit for the good parts of glee but this one was all Naya (with help from Heather Morris, of course). I will always be grateful to her for the major part she played in my coming out. Rachels song, Theres a moment, right at the end, right after One gunshot and BAM! I love suckin on those salamander lips. Rosario Cruz. The second could be anything. Santana: (at Finn) You told her too? We saw that throughout Kurt and Santanas extended coming outs and we couldve seen it more if Santana was given space to date and be her own character in the backhalf of the show. I won't tell Lauren to look out for poachers who might might mistake her for the endangered white rhino. Its pure joy and when I think of Naya Rivera as Santana Lopez what I feel is joy. (slaps Quinn across face) Quinn: You can't hit me! someone who knows more than three dance moves: the finger wag, the I've waited 5 years for this. By accepting all cookies, you agree to our use of cookies to deliver and maintain our services and site, improve the quality of Reddit, personalize Reddit content and advertising, and measure the effectiveness of advertising. Santana: You wanna have a duel? Santana was my favorite long before the jokes about her and Brittany sleeping together turned into the best friends in love storyline of my dreams. Santana, Tina and Will, Silly Love Songs. I assume you've been working as a baby polisher where young mothers place their infant's heads in your mouth to get back that new born shine. Unmatched sass and the best . You are not my principal. Your bizarre, psychosexual obsession with that Glee Club was disturbing from the first moment you stalked a nude student in the showers. Were almost ten years later and Ill never forget her cadence as she says it, the hurt that flashes across her face. Santana to Mr. Schuester, Bad Reputation. Rachel: I don't know what you're talking about. mozzart jackpot winners yesterday; new mandela effects 2021; how to delete a payee on barclays app She was truth to power, unafraid of confrontation, destruction when absolutely necessary. And two, they grant wishes. The first is horrible but predictable. This is toned down. For me there is a before, and an after. Santana leaves it all at Brittanys feet in that choir room, and so did Naya. He's made of magic. Brittany: God, I'm so sad. I love Santanas relationship with Brittany because obviously Brittana 4 Ever, but I also love how Santana is able to be vulnerable with Brittany in a way she wouldnt be with anyone else. Santana: You should be our nations president. Hi DM! (sings in background) Santana: I want to be with you. Her quiet almost embarrassed because its so vulnerable and what will it all mean glances to Brittany from behind Hollys shoulders are all I see. Maybe he finally got freaked out by your strange I cant remember the last time I felt so surprised, validated, and delighted by a coming out (Waverly Earp got close!). Soy de Lima Heights Adjacent y yo tengo orgullo! The only reason why the New Directions beat the Troubletones at Sectionals is because that pervy clown judge was freaking high as a kite. That pause in the beginning Glee never pauses. Normally you dress like a fantasy of a perverted Japanese business man with a very dark specific fetish but I actually dig this look. How about we just get you an IPad.. you can't even get porn on whatever you just asked for. Rachel and Santana, The Power of Madonna. I wanna make a fake baby with you!". Maybe that You're not fat. #monologues What would you do? I have been heartbroken over this. Gunther: I take this! Brittany: It's just a stupid crown. Now my suggestion is that we drag him, bound and gagged, to a tattoo parlor for a tramp stamp that reads Tips Appreciated or Congratulations, Youre My 1,000th Customer', Santana to Kurt about Sebastian, Michael. 13- Glee, Finn Hudson 14- Glee, Rachel Berry 15- Glee, Sue Sylvester . Santana: You know..I blame Sam for all this..and Rachel too, I blame her. I love you. Brittany: Yeah, come on, Quinn. Copyright 2009 - 2023 The Excitant Group, LLC. Its the dress that sells the song before Santana even opens her mouth. Who cares if he's terrified of banks? No, kiss me! Im kind of like the Incredible Hulk. Shes able to admit something embarrassing like her desire to just fit in, and, maybe more significantly, her knowledge that even with her cheerleader beauty she really does not. Maybe I need someone who knows more than three dance moves: "the finger wag", "the shoulder shimmy" and the one where you pretend to twirl two invisible rainbow-colored ribbons attached to your hips. "WHAT?! Santana: Maybe Brittany and I are too young to get married. There are quantifiably positive assets to this mash-up: the song suits Mercedes and Santana vocally, its got good choreography, its a well-orchestrated mash-up the dresses are cute. Thank you Naya. Don't you have any wishes that you really want to come true? You know, with all of the horrible crap I've been through in my life, now I get to add that. I'm a bitch because I'm angry. Cello guys can you hang back for a second, Im gonna need you for this one. Santana to Brittany and Sam, Blame It on the Alcohol. Why would I Why would I want that? Santanas soft uh-oh doesnt come in until the first chorus, but shes all I ever hear. And it wasn't until I got to kindergarten that I learned my name wasn't Garbage Face. But I won't join without you. Wanna put a fish hook in those lips so cherry red, Santana: Booyah. I love Brittana, but one of the best parts of Glee is that unlike a lot of other shows its queer characters queerness was not reliant on one other person. Its like the difference between a hurricane and an alien invasion. And I'm definitely sure that Tina's looked into getting an eye de-slanting. feels like a fever dream that does NOT have a, I love this, please let me read your kinky biography. She's blond and awesome and so smart. I just try to be really, really honest with people when I think that they suck! I have razor blades hidden in my hair. Shes beautiful, shes innocent, shes everything thats good in this miserable, stinking world. Wed love to read your favorite memories in the comments. Sebastian: She questioned my honor. This is it. Hold up, could we all just get real here for a second? I came out to my mother about a month after Santana came out to her abuela. I only watched Glee briefly. Who gives a crap what all the other peasants think? Everything you needed to know, every emotion you needed to feel, was emanating from Santana with crystal clearness. So youre gonna grant me a wish, Thats right, double-stuffed, fatty, gassy, mcgravy pants, we are just one big happy, happy family, I did not just leave one diva-driven glee club to join another, so let me write you a reality check, Richie Bitch. Santana to Rachel, Tina in the Sky with Diamonds. This is garbage. Im a star. Brittany: Well, I told you last year that if I was single and you were single, we would mingle. Your friend Brody? Okay, look. All day every day. After a few instances of Santana being cute and flustered in front of her new diner coworker, they end up with a night shift together. MIKE: Is that why you're wearing blue contacts today, Tina? Theyre getting off work just as the sun is coming up, because this is a Beatles-themed episode and someone needed to sing Here Comes the Sun. And also because its really adorable and romantic. Wooh! (and Brittana / Faberry fans can come at me, bro, but Quinntana is the ship that I will go down with). Your pretty little liar gave them to her. Did Dakota Johnson Come Out as Bisexual, or Just Hang Out With Cara Delevingne? (bumps into him) Finn: Hey Santana! This is only temporary. I have hated you ever since the day I met you. And Santana! I mean sure, she was blackmailing Karofsky at the time, but hey coming out and the self-loathing that often comes with it is messy business. You finally got an okay haircut. I mean I wouldn't know because like Medusa I try to avoid eye contact with her. Sometimes you hear it on the loudspeakers at Home Goods and feel like complaining to the manager for inappropriate context, but when its on in your car or at a party or a club its exhilarating and obviously very topical. Every time you open your humongous mouth to do an impression or moisten an enormous stamp for a lazy giant, you take one step closer to everyone seeing that you are actually a dork. [points at Rachel] Finn: I said I thought you were great. I mean I am, just not now. Santana, the bitchy cheerleader, certainly didnt originate as anything like an underdog and even as her character developed and she came out, she still was rarely written as such. The cast of Glee reunites during the virtual ceremony for the 32nd Annual GLAAD Media Awards for a special tribute to the legacy of the late Naya Rivera's ch. You better believe theyll regret it. Let me break it down for you, from one bitch to another. Santana: A baby? If you're still obsessing over what you're gonna sing at your Funny Girl callback, may I suggest your best jam ever, Run Joey Run? Mostly, though, the dialogue. For the LGBTQ+ community, Santana's storyline of coming to terms with her. Santana: Al Roker is disgusting by the way. So often on Glee theyd shoehorn a storyline to fit a song they wanted to do, or stretch a song to fit a plot, but with this mashup, it didnt actually matter what the words were saying or whether or not they had anything to do with the plot of the episode. Kurt I took what you said to heart, and I thought long and hard about it, and it occurred to me that you may have a point. Lord of the bling. Puck: We all know why we're here. #teens. Santana: Okay, look believe what you want, but no one's forcing me to be here. For your joy, for your talent, for teaching me how to be unapologetic about the things I love. Its where we fell in love, where I could say things with music, when words just werent enough. You told coach Sylvester about my summer surgery! Quinn: I'm flattered Santana, but I'm not really that into that.Santana: No, no I'm not talking about that, I'm talking about a haircut. Santana defending Blaine and Kurt from Dave, A Night of Neglect. Those arent generic Latinx details. I'm Hispanic. Maybe he got tired of watching you drape yourself on every piano you happen to pass to entertain exactly no one with, say, some song that Judy Garland choked on her tongue in the middle of or some sassy old Broadway standard made famous by another dead alcoholic crone. Even I felt a little something in my lady loins when he did that magic sex dance. I just see someone who I may or may not have to destroy.So if you ever tell me what to do I will END you! Santana about Rachel and Kurt, Girls (and Boys) on Film. You can't break up the Unholy Trinity. I understand. Quinn: And we're here to apologize to Quinn for slapping her across the face very very hard. Maybe it has nothing to do with me and Brittany. This is for us. Santana to Kurt about his poster, I Am Unicorn. She was unapologetic ambition and talent. I came out as a lesbian around the time Glee started, but as Glee went on and I loved it more and more (until I didnt, but thats beside the point), I also came out as a huge and utter nerd. Santana: Well, that's why I brought you here, to cheer you up. (Will asks about Christmas tree) Will: And the ornaments? Every day just feels like a war. I'm the hottest piece of action in this school, and here I am, on Valentine's and single. But I gots to say I finally feel like I have found my people. You wanna play with me, Kurt? She didnt have the space to be a victim like Rachel. I'm in love with myself, and I would never change a thing. Rachel: No. You're going to stay in the closet, get married, get drunk to have relations with your wife, have a couple kids, maybe become a state senator, or a deacon, and then get caught in the men's room tapping your foot with some page. Maybe Brittany and I are too young to get married. I just wanna go back in time man. The transcendent vulnerability, more than weve ever seen from Santana. My chest was squeezed so tight I could barely breathe and I felt like I was watching it from outside my body. But theres a deeper level too: Santana singing and dancing like a person whos just been told something terrible is about to happen but shes not sure what that something will be and for now the show must go on. But then well, Ill let her speak for herself: Thank you, guys. And while coming to terms with her sexuality and feelings for Brittany certainly softened her and always and especially with Brittany herself it never weakened her resolve or ability to deliver a devastating verbal barb with the precision of an assassin. elaborate wet dreams. Wrong-Flower Quinn is all excited about another guy defining her life. Later, Santana cuts through the dancers and bellows, Dont Forget Me! Those are all the things I think about when I watch Santana strut down the theatres aisle singing (gasp!) Whatever. They were my favorite grouping Glee ever did. When we had sex, Finn never stopped asking me if I was okay the whole time. Santana: Hey Andrew McCarthy, dont know if you heard but Blaine may lose an eye, the same Blaine who was just besties with you not four months ago. So be warned: if you are not giving this everything you've got, I WILL go all Lima Heights on your sorry asses. Hands down my favourite and the best ever scene on Glee. What I realized What I realized is why I'm such a bitch all the time. Think I could get used to here in New York. From Season 6 Episode 3 "Jagged Little Tapestry", aired January 16th, 2015 By rejecting non-essential cookies, Reddit may still use certain cookies to ensure the proper functionality of our platform. Santana: Yeah, I do. Brittany: OK. Puck's super fine. I am forever grateful that Naya pushed for the storyline to be more than it was intended to be. In my opinion, this scene/song is one of the most underrated of the Glee canon.

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glee monologues santana